Recently, a leader in a national ministry to men proclaimed that a major challenge facing many men today is: passivity. So, what does this look like? There are many types of passivity. Here, I would like to focus on what this looks like a man's #1 ministry--at home with his wife and children.
At home, it is a man who is withdrawn, inactive, and self-centered. He is distant from his wife and children. He allows what is happening around him to just happen without any participation, guidance, or input from him. This inactivity, guys, is sin.
"The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to His church, not by domineering but by cherishing." (Ephesians 5: 23 MSG). Bibically, guys we are commanded to lead. Leadership does not just happen. It is not conveyed by bearing a title. Leaders are active participants in what and who they are leading. Leaders give--they are not takers. "Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church--a love marked by giving, not getting." (Ephesians 5: 25 MSG). Passivity denotes taking and giving little or nothing.
Passivity is a learned behavior. Numerous, and sometimes complex, reasons stand behind this (in)action. But please understand, what I am referring to here is a pattern of passivity. It is not the periodic event where we may be a bit distant. We all get tired periodically. We do have a lot on our plates. As men, sometimes we just want to be left alone. Absent a consistent pattern of this type, this attitude is not the sin I am referring to. Passivity is an ongoing, consistent disengagement from your family.
As with any learned behavior, it can be un-learned. But, you have to first recognize that passivity is not a good thing. That is not how God created you. So, allow God to take that inactivity away. Ask Him to strengthen you to re-engage. Doesn't your family deserve a husband and dad that is engaged and pro-active in leading the family relationship? I think they do.
Stay Strong.
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